I miss writing. I used to write all the time, more than just my thoughts or feelings in a couple sentences. Now and then I enjoy telling stories, partly because of nostalgia, partly for an outlet, sometimes to help me remember or because a memory popped up, but mostly I just enjoy writing. It feels good, and I could use some practice, so here is a short, true story about random weirdness and dumb assery in my life...
The first time I broke down on the side of the road I was probably barely 18 driving my 94 Chevy Cavalier on a hotter than hell night, and in typical genius teenager fashion I ran out of gas driving home from DeWitt. This night also just so happened to be the one night in entire time of me having a phone, I forgot to bring it with me. I was on Waverly Rd and Willow; for those of you who don't know about the Lansing area, Willow is NOT the street you want your lone teenage daughter wandering.Anyway, so I started heading toward houses up Waverly a bit.
I approached a couple in front of what appeared to be a house party going on, asking a couple guys if I could use the phone. One of the dudes ignored me, smoking his cigarette with his nose up in the air like a posing model, and the other mumbled something like, "psshhh Iunno ma girl inside pissed and I ain't about to get into sheeit". I kindly thanked them and continued my journey.
I got as far as Hungry Howies on Saginaw, about a mile up the road, when a man in a convertible stopped beside me. He was a white dude, gigantic white hat tilted to the side, clothes so big they appeared to be melting off him, and of course dem chains. Anyway. I stood there in desperation, sweaty, red faced, sporting my grunge look of torn jeans and a Beavis and Butthead punks shirt, and OF FUCKING COURSE the guy looks at me from head to toe, then back again, and signals for me to get in as he cranked up the ac and handed me his phone. I called my mom, and she was on her way. He introduced himself as Mark, "Hi. I'm Rachel.". He bit his lip, looking up and down my body again and abruptly asked, er, demanded, LEMME GIVE YOU SOME DICK. Huh? What did you just? Before I could finish my thought, he drove 2 fast 2 furiously down the street and into the driveway of what he claimed to be his very nice, very large house. Nothing creepy or red flaggy at all about it. I was so tired, hot, and miserable, not quite in the mood for random road side sex, and it didn't even occur to me as to what could happen next. I became angry shutting down all thoughts and punched his dash while screaming "I'M A FUCKING VIRGIN TAKE ME TO MY CAR". Aiiiiight. So he drove me back to my car, and before I got out he put his head on my lap looking longingly up at me, "Come on Raaaaachel come onnnnnn". "Get off me, before I rip your tongue out with me teeth." He laughed nervously, sat up, and said aiiiiiiight. I got out. He left. Story over.
Come to think of it, another time my car broke down was in EL, and I ran into a guy I sort of knew, if you were an East Lansing or Pinball Pete's regular you may have known him. He was awkward, tall, skinny, pale, wore glasses and a cowboy hat everyone made fun of him for... John? He made like, chain-mail and leather armor and jewelry and shit. Anyway he took me to get jumper cables, which I didn't even ask for because I knew it was my alternator, not my battery, and when that failed he waited with me for the tow truck. As we
waited he so casually looked through his glove box in front of me, "here hold this"... it was a box of magnums. I'm not stupid, I know what you're trying to do. He also did the head in my lap thing while looking longingly up at me. Is this how every guy tries to bang the women they save from their broke down vehicles? I was much nicer to this guy though, seeing as I knew him and he didn't say stupid shit like LEMME GIVE YOU SOME DICK. Ugh.